Ah yes....here we are again.....trying to make some decisions and not sure which direction to take. My naturally sunny disposition is taking a bit of a hit.
Where to move, when to move, time to quit, time to not quit....these are the things that are plaguing my thoughts. I'm on my spring break, trying to make plans for the future but completely unsure of what that future will look like.
Moving, jobs, kids, friends, family...all of these things play into our decisions, and yet, I don't feel like these decisions are mine to make, at least not alone. Put into play a partner that keeps many things close to his chest and doesn't even always want to share them with me, and we've got a bit of a mess.
Right now, I've got a job that's secure and stable. He's in flux. He's always been in flux, which is fine when I've got the stability, but if we're in the same boat, that makes me crazy. I don't know what to do. I don't even know where to begin thinking about all of this. One thing is clear, though, I don't think I will be moving here to this tiny Alberta town, which is kind of too bad, 'cause I was looking forward to that.
I guess I will just feel better if we have a plan that everyone is happy with. Do I need to start looking for a job in Toronto?? Will I be able to find anything?? It worries me. Although, I guess there is always subbing and I could find a job doing something else, too....but what?? Administrative assistant?? It would be a bit of a waste in terms of my degree, but a job is a job right??
And what about kids?? How does that play into everything?? We both want a baby...
Right now, I'm just waiting for him to get home. We need to lay out some plans here and we need to do it soon.
In the meantime, I will just worry...
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Into the Wild Blue Yonder
It's been a long time since I posted anything here...but now I have a lot to worry about....
We are moving....yep, that's right, moving....away from here.....
I didn't move around as a kid...in fact, I spent my whole school career in the same building, too....
The only moving I've ever done has been as an adult, from home to dorm, from dorm to apartment, from apartment to teeny-tiny house, from teeny-tiny house to mature adult house...
To make matters worse, we have only 3 weeks in which to move!
As you can imagine, that makes me EXTREMELY worried. Tonight's activities will be brought to you by the letter P (for packing) and B (for many, many boxes).
We are moving....yep, that's right, moving....away from here.....
I didn't move around as a kid...in fact, I spent my whole school career in the same building, too....
The only moving I've ever done has been as an adult, from home to dorm, from dorm to apartment, from apartment to teeny-tiny house, from teeny-tiny house to mature adult house...
To make matters worse, we have only 3 weeks in which to move!
As you can imagine, that makes me EXTREMELY worried. Tonight's activities will be brought to you by the letter P (for packing) and B (for many, many boxes).
Friday, August 14, 2009
Sunny Days
Now, I don't really worry about the sun per se. I love the sun! I like being hot! I do believe I mentioned in a previous post about how the sun and warmth are important for Manitobans because of our vicious winters, so I won't go into it again.
Today, I woke up to the rain pelting my roof, and a lingering thunderstorm heading away towards the east. The weather reports were not good. More rain, more thunderstorms, no sun. So I canceled my beach plans and went for a walk instead. It was drizzling when we started our walk, at some points raining a little harder than a drizzle. But as we were on our way home, the sky got brighter and brighter, and by the time we were having breakfast, it was actually almost sunny, and THEN by the time we were leaving the restaurant the sun was peaking through clouds and I saw some blue sky!
What to do with a cloudy, rainy day that turns sunny??!! How can I get outside?? Is it too late to go to the beach?? Can I find someone to go with me?? I don't have the car, will someone be able to drive?? What if I just stay in the city, is it too wet to bike around?? Will there be a lot of puddles?? It will surely be humid, maybe I should stay inside instead?? Maybe I should go and find some air conditioning??
It's frustrating because you don't want to waste the day, especially with the summer we have had, but it's also exhilarating because a sunny, warm summer day is so magical...
So...what to do??
Today, I woke up to the rain pelting my roof, and a lingering thunderstorm heading away towards the east. The weather reports were not good. More rain, more thunderstorms, no sun. So I canceled my beach plans and went for a walk instead. It was drizzling when we started our walk, at some points raining a little harder than a drizzle. But as we were on our way home, the sky got brighter and brighter, and by the time we were having breakfast, it was actually almost sunny, and THEN by the time we were leaving the restaurant the sun was peaking through clouds and I saw some blue sky!
What to do with a cloudy, rainy day that turns sunny??!! How can I get outside?? Is it too late to go to the beach?? Can I find someone to go with me?? I don't have the car, will someone be able to drive?? What if I just stay in the city, is it too wet to bike around?? Will there be a lot of puddles?? It will surely be humid, maybe I should stay inside instead?? Maybe I should go and find some air conditioning??
It's frustrating because you don't want to waste the day, especially with the summer we have had, but it's also exhilarating because a sunny, warm summer day is so magical...
So...what to do??
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Nothing to worry about??
I had nothing to worry about yesterday because I went to the beach with a dear friend of mine who always takes care of the planning so I have nothing to do there but read magazines and books and go swimming....
Well, at least that's what I wish would happen...
The beach part did not involve any worry at all. It was glorious. Warm sun, perfect water temperature, a good book and lots of people (as people watching is essential at the beach!) made for the most wonderful beach day of the summer so far.
And the worrying didn't really start until we were making plans to go home. I was meeting up with my family in the evening and I thought we had made plans....but apparently I was the only one who knew the plans even though they had been discussed two days before.
What time are we meeting? Where are we going? Is B. coming? Did anyone call him?? Is H. coming?? He may have other plans?? Doesn't he think this is important?? What if we don't get in?? How long do we have to stand in line?? Do they have air-conditioning?? Why are there so many mosquitoes?? What if there is a thunderstorm while we are out here waiting?? Do they take debit??
It turns out that I shouldn't have worried and me biting H's head off before we left, was unnecessary and mean....Everything worked out fine and he deserves an apology...as usual:)
Well, at least that's what I wish would happen...
The beach part did not involve any worry at all. It was glorious. Warm sun, perfect water temperature, a good book and lots of people (as people watching is essential at the beach!) made for the most wonderful beach day of the summer so far.
And the worrying didn't really start until we were making plans to go home. I was meeting up with my family in the evening and I thought we had made plans....but apparently I was the only one who knew the plans even though they had been discussed two days before.
What time are we meeting? Where are we going? Is B. coming? Did anyone call him?? Is H. coming?? He may have other plans?? Doesn't he think this is important?? What if we don't get in?? How long do we have to stand in line?? Do they have air-conditioning?? Why are there so many mosquitoes?? What if there is a thunderstorm while we are out here waiting?? Do they take debit??
It turns out that I shouldn't have worried and me biting H's head off before we left, was unnecessary and mean....Everything worked out fine and he deserves an apology...as usual:)
Monday, August 10, 2009
Heat Stroke
Summer has not been kind to this part of the country....Cool weather, lots of rain and very little sun does not for happy Manitobans make. We need our hot, humid summers to make our cold and fierce winters bearable. The thought of sitting on a patio on a hot summer night in late July is the only real memory that sustains us during a brilliantly cold week in early February....but I digress.
We crave the heat and I am a sun-seeker. I like to sit at the beach from morning until late afternoon, reading magazines and a book, eating snacks and people watching. I like the warmth on my skin and the feel of the gritty sand between my toes. However, spending the day at the beach also brings a few concerns....
I once had sun stroke after a friend's birthday party. I had been outside since early in the morning, playing outside with my brother. Then, I spent the hot afternoon playing outside at the birthday party. I was six years old. I came home from the party feeling very strange. I don't remember much except lying on the couch feeling sick and my mom saying that she should have paid a little more attention to how much water I was drinking, etc etc.
So now I have to be careful. Have I put on enough sunscreen? Should I go into the shade? Will my hat be sufficient?? Am I drinking enough water?? Is this feeling of tiredness accompanied by nausea?? Am I feeling sick?? Did I eat enough today?? Is this granola bar going to sustain me?? Should I have brough more food?? Should I go home?? Will I be okay to drive?? Do I have a sunburn?? Will it blister?? I haven't had a bad sunburn since I was 15, will this bring on sunsickness??
Of course, it doesn't prevent me from actually going to the beach! Only clouds and rain can do that:)
We crave the heat and I am a sun-seeker. I like to sit at the beach from morning until late afternoon, reading magazines and a book, eating snacks and people watching. I like the warmth on my skin and the feel of the gritty sand between my toes. However, spending the day at the beach also brings a few concerns....
I once had sun stroke after a friend's birthday party. I had been outside since early in the morning, playing outside with my brother. Then, I spent the hot afternoon playing outside at the birthday party. I was six years old. I came home from the party feeling very strange. I don't remember much except lying on the couch feeling sick and my mom saying that she should have paid a little more attention to how much water I was drinking, etc etc.
So now I have to be careful. Have I put on enough sunscreen? Should I go into the shade? Will my hat be sufficient?? Am I drinking enough water?? Is this feeling of tiredness accompanied by nausea?? Am I feeling sick?? Did I eat enough today?? Is this granola bar going to sustain me?? Should I have brough more food?? Should I go home?? Will I be okay to drive?? Do I have a sunburn?? Will it blister?? I haven't had a bad sunburn since I was 15, will this bring on sunsickness??
Of course, it doesn't prevent me from actually going to the beach! Only clouds and rain can do that:)
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Crossing the Border
I spent last weekend in Chicago...What a fantastic city! Many friendly people, easy to get around, great shopping...it has everything I want in a big city. The only problem when a girl from Manitoba crosses into the United States of America is that she somehow must get back into her own country. The border guards from Canada into the United States are usually friendly, courteous, and eager to let you into their country so that you will eat their food, drink their liquor and buy tons of things that you don't need in the hopes of kick-starting their economy again.....They basically welcome you with open arms and give you treats like cheap booze and sales every time you turn around.
Getting back into the country of your birth however, continually proves difficult and even, at times, scary. The reason for this is that anything can happen. The stories of friends, friends of friends and even people who "knows someone who once..." are varied and developed to create such a sense of impending doom as you approach the border crossing, grown men and women have been known to freak out about such little things as what time they crossed into the states or how much money they spent in the states.
Here is what you need to worry about, should you ever be in this situation (and what I worry about every time I try to get back into my own country):
Do I have all of my receipts? Are there tags on all of the things that I purchased?? Will they believe me that this is the item I purchased even if it doesn't have the tags?? Will I get hauled into the garage??? Will I have to repack all of my things?? How will I ever get everything back in the suitcase if they do decide to rip it open?? Why can't this border guard just smile for once?? Why are they asking me over and over again what time I crossed into the states?? Is the limit $400 USD or $400 CAD?? What if I get hauled into one of those dungeon-like interogation rooms and they take control of my identity?? What if they slash the seats of the van?? Who has to pay for that?? Do I have my passport with me?? Do they take debit cards if I have to pay duty?? How much alcohol can I bring into Canada?? Why do I go to the states again?? Are the deals really better?? Is it worth it to drive 8 hours, stay in a hotel for a weekend so that I can get $10 off of a T-shirt that I really don't need?? Hmm.....
Anyway, consider yourself warned....
Getting back into the country of your birth however, continually proves difficult and even, at times, scary. The reason for this is that anything can happen. The stories of friends, friends of friends and even people who "knows someone who once..." are varied and developed to create such a sense of impending doom as you approach the border crossing, grown men and women have been known to freak out about such little things as what time they crossed into the states or how much money they spent in the states.
Here is what you need to worry about, should you ever be in this situation (and what I worry about every time I try to get back into my own country):
Do I have all of my receipts? Are there tags on all of the things that I purchased?? Will they believe me that this is the item I purchased even if it doesn't have the tags?? Will I get hauled into the garage??? Will I have to repack all of my things?? How will I ever get everything back in the suitcase if they do decide to rip it open?? Why can't this border guard just smile for once?? Why are they asking me over and over again what time I crossed into the states?? Is the limit $400 USD or $400 CAD?? What if I get hauled into one of those dungeon-like interogation rooms and they take control of my identity?? What if they slash the seats of the van?? Who has to pay for that?? Do I have my passport with me?? Do they take debit cards if I have to pay duty?? How much alcohol can I bring into Canada?? Why do I go to the states again?? Are the deals really better?? Is it worth it to drive 8 hours, stay in a hotel for a weekend so that I can get $10 off of a T-shirt that I really don't need?? Hmm.....
Anyway, consider yourself warned....
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Too Much Alone Time
By nature, I am a social creature. I like to have people around. I like to chat. I like companionship.
But I am also a homebody. Usually, I am quite content to sit at home on my holidays and read or watch TV. I like alone time, just not too much.
I have been alone with my thoughts for a few days in a row now, and I am done with it.
I start to wonder if I am going crazy. Am I depressed? Am I getting fat? Is there something else I should be doing?? Am I lazy?? Why is there nothing on TV? Why do I insist on watching crap?? Why haven't my emails been answered?? Why is no one commenting on facebook?? Where is everyone??
So thankfully, I am leaving on a road trip. I will have PLENTY of socializing, stuck in a van for 14 hours with a variety of people.
Will anyone be offended if I throw on the headphones and listen to the ipod??
But I am also a homebody. Usually, I am quite content to sit at home on my holidays and read or watch TV. I like alone time, just not too much.
I have been alone with my thoughts for a few days in a row now, and I am done with it.
I start to wonder if I am going crazy. Am I depressed? Am I getting fat? Is there something else I should be doing?? Am I lazy?? Why is there nothing on TV? Why do I insist on watching crap?? Why haven't my emails been answered?? Why is no one commenting on facebook?? Where is everyone??
So thankfully, I am leaving on a road trip. I will have PLENTY of socializing, stuck in a van for 14 hours with a variety of people.
Will anyone be offended if I throw on the headphones and listen to the ipod??
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