Ah yes....here we are again.....trying to make some decisions and not sure which direction to take. My naturally sunny disposition is taking a bit of a hit.
Where to move, when to move, time to quit, time to not quit....these are the things that are plaguing my thoughts. I'm on my spring break, trying to make plans for the future but completely unsure of what that future will look like.
Moving, jobs, kids, friends, family...all of these things play into our decisions, and yet, I don't feel like these decisions are mine to make, at least not alone. Put into play a partner that keeps many things close to his chest and doesn't even always want to share them with me, and we've got a bit of a mess.
Right now, I've got a job that's secure and stable. He's in flux. He's always been in flux, which is fine when I've got the stability, but if we're in the same boat, that makes me crazy. I don't know what to do. I don't even know where to begin thinking about all of this. One thing is clear, though, I don't think I will be moving here to this tiny Alberta town, which is kind of too bad, 'cause I was looking forward to that.
I guess I will just feel better if we have a plan that everyone is happy with. Do I need to start looking for a job in Toronto?? Will I be able to find anything?? It worries me. Although, I guess there is always subbing and I could find a job doing something else, too....but what?? Administrative assistant?? It would be a bit of a waste in terms of my degree, but a job is a job right??
And what about kids?? How does that play into everything?? We both want a baby...
Right now, I'm just waiting for him to get home. We need to lay out some plans here and we need to do it soon.
In the meantime, I will just worry...
